I imagined I followed you into the sea once and I could breath under water. You were about ten years old and had the wildest brown hair that curled and fell to the small of your back. You called to me, turning around with laughing eyes, beckoning me to join you. I slowly walked into the sea and I kept walking and the waves didn’t sway me, I just walked and I didn’t feel the chill of the water. It reached my ankles first, then my knees, then my chest, it covered my eyes , I became fully submerged and I could still blink and I could still hear you. I could barely see in front of me but I saw you and you stopped and called out to me. I kept walking, calling “Zia, Zia, Zia wait for me, I am going to drown”. “No you won’t mummy”, you called out “just follow me” but you kept running, your wild hair floating about now, wrapping around your pale face. I still couldn’t feel the cold of the sea but I knew it was freezing. I almost caught up to you, but when I reached out for you, you disappeared right there in front of me, blowing me one last kiss. Gone. I couldn’t breath suddenly, realising where I was, everything was dark and I couldnt see behind me nor above me. The water was icy cold now. I tried to kick to the surface but I couldn’t. How long did I walk for. I was stuck, I was alone, I couldn’t hear anything, i couldn’t see anything. I called for you, I reached out for you, but there was nothing, no-one, I realise I couldn’t have followed you, I walked into the sea alone and I now couldn’t get out, gasping I realised I could drown. I realised would drown. I had chased a dream. I chased my dreams into the sea.