After Zia died, people often say that I should try again or ask if we are going to. I like to believe their comments come from a good place but unfortunately it isn’t welcome right now. I wrote this after being asked that one to many times. My daughter wasn’t an accident, she was a much loved and much needed baby. She will always be my Zia, my second child and my only daughter.
Try again
It implies that before doesnt matter anymore,
it implies that I must move forward.
it implies that I must count my losses,
it implies that she was a gamble
she could have stayed but had to go.
it implies that i didnt try hard enough,
it implies that she didnt matter,
it implies that she can be replaced,
it implies that I have failed.
This Little Light of Mine 
To try again, or not, or when, is so deeply personal and just so loaded. It’s not a question I answer.
This is beautiful. I lost my daughter almost 4 months ago and this is what I’ve been struggling with lately, that people won’t remember her, that they think a child is so easily replaceable, that I will be a mother ‘one day.’ I am a mother, to a perfect little girl who just isn’t here in my arms. It’s so hard for people to understand. I wish they had better things to say if they feel the need to say something.
This is beautiful. I lost my daughter almost 4 months ago and this is what I’ve been struggling with lately, that people won’t remember her, that they think a child is so easily replaceable, that I will be a mother ‘one day.’ I am a mother, to a perfect little girl who just isn’t here in my arms. It’s so hard for people to understand. I wish they had better things to say if they feel the need to say something.
This is beautiful. I lost my daughter almost 4 months ago and this is what I’ve been struggling with lately, that people won’t remember her, that they think a child is so easily replaceable, that I will be a mother ‘one day.’ I am a mother, to a perfect little girl, she just isn’t here in my arms. It’s so hard for people to understand. I wish they had better things to say if they feel the need to say something.
I’m so sorry your Zia isn’t here with you. Your words here truly bring her to life. You are a wonderful mother.
Thank you do much for these beautiful words. I understand completely what you are saying. the comments have been so heartbreaking over the last year. Our childrens lives are very significant and we do not need others to advocate that but it would make life a whole lot easier. I am sorry for your loss and I wish you peace. Treasure the memory and life of your little one. We are the keepers of a scared trasure.